Amateur Night

This morning as I was flipping through my Washington Post app, I saw an article with the intriguing title “It’s Okay to Go Out on Valentine’s Day.” In my imagination, the article was going to be about the question of whether it is appropriate for Catholics – Roman or Anglican – to go out for a fancy dinner on this particular Valentine’s Day, which also happens to be Ash Wednesday. I imagined an analysis of this year’s liturgical calendar, which amusingly pairs not only Ash Wednesday and Valentine’s Day but also Easter Day and April Fool’s Day. I imagined a history of the tradition of fasting, a description of different types of fasts, and an expert opinion on whether an intimate dinner for two tonight should include things like champagne, or chocolate truffles, or a porterhouse.

Instead, the article, written by reporter Maura Judkis, is about the disdain with which most foodies, including chefs and others in the food industry, view dining out on Valentine’s Day. This disdain is not directed towards the food itself, although Judkis did dedicate a few paragraphs to the disappointing and disappointingly expensive prix fixe menus many restaurants offer on this holiday. No, the disdain Judkis wrote about is the disdain with which foodies and chefs view the people who go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day. As one chef put it, these people are “a completely different demographic” from their normal customers. These people are those who don’t regularly dine at fine restaurants. These people are those who have had to save up for a nice meal out, for whom “fine dining” conjures up images of surf and turf and chocolate lava cake, not the Sweet Onion Crepe with Parmesan and White Truffle Fondue and Duck with Tardivo, Puntarella, and Sauce Genovese you might find at a restaurant like, say, Vetri.* These people are likely to order their steak well done. They’re likely to ask for Thousand Island dressing. They’re likely to order a glass of white zinfandel or – gasp! – merlot. These diners, some snooty chefs complain, are looking for haute cuisine but wouldn’t know it if they accidentally stabbed it with a fork. And so these chefs give this night a particularly cynical, snobbish nickname: Amateur Night.

Now I saw some of you blanch when I mentioned white zinfandel. And I will confess to you that I myself have rolled an eye a time or two when overhearing people order their steak with no pink and their wine with an ice cube. Thank God that today is a day for confession and repentance, am I right? Judkis has this to say about such snobbery: “Knock it off.” Stop being cynical about people who want to “splurge on stereotypical romantic meals,” she says. Just stop. Knock it off. Go out for Valentine’s Day, she tells her readers, and don’t let anybody talk you out of your white zin. Drink it all, even with an ice cube, and have a lovely night.

Setting aside its decided lack of advice on how to integrate the Lenten fast with the traditional indulgences of Valentine’s Day – a topic we can safely skip because it’s after 7 now, and you’re here, so I’m guessing you’ve figured that out for yourselves – Judkis’s article is an interesting lens with which to view our own experiences of Lent. For who among us has not at some point in our lives felt like a bit of an amateur when it comes to Lenten disciplines? We’re feeling pretty good about deciding to give up diet Coke, but then we hear about someone who’s eating only one meal a day or meditating for three hours every night and suddenly our diet Coke fast seems a little bush-league. We know we’re not supposed to rank our Lenten practices like they were an Olympic sport, but sometimes it’s hard to avoid the comparisons. Because our Lenten practices are important. We know what the season of Lent means to us and to the world, and so we want to do Lent well. Of course we want to find a practice that feels significant, that challenges us, or perhaps that proves that we have a sophisticated palate for self-denial. Who wants to be known as just a “different spiritual demographic” from those saintly souls who really get what Lent is about? Who wants to hear someone in the next pew call this gathering Amateur Night?

Let us take some comfort in the knowledge that there was no greater gathering of spiritual amateurs than the crowds listening to Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. These were not professional theologians sitting at Jesus’ feet. These were not the ministers who were trained to stand between the vestibule and the altar and weep. These people were just amateurs. They worshiped, yes. They paid for sacrifices in the temple when they could. They blessed their bread and wine and prayed for God’s guidance and favor and mercy. But for the most part they were completely new at this. Jesus’ entire ministry was new; these people were just beginning to hear and see what Our Lord had to show them. They had hopes, maybe even expectations, but they had no idea what they were getting into; even the spiritual leaders in the crowd, including the disciples, were far from experts.

Jesus knows this. He knows that these people are harassed and helpless and hungry for something they can scarcely define. He knows that they are spiritual amateurs, and yet he feeds them anyway. He feeds them anyway, and with real food. He offers sophisticated sustenance about being blessed even when you suffer. He employs delicate, subtle flavors in his teaching about forgiveness; he brings out the essence of the law which includes not only what the people do or say but also how they think and feel. He offers them real food from a banquet table rich with truth, and he fully expects that even these amateurs will eat. When you pray, he says, not if. When you pray, when you fast, when you give alms – when you practice your faith, always remember the maker who gave you that faith in the first place. And your maker who sees in secret will reward you.

The truth is that we’re all amateurs when it comes to the spiritual life. We’re all looking for things that are truly just a fraction of what God can give. We find ourselves quite happy with the prix fixe because we can’t imagine what might be on the regular menu. We order Thousand Island dressing when God has prepared something far more glorious than just mayo, Worcestershire, and ketchup. We’re total amateurs, and God knows this. He knows that we are hungry for something we can scarcely imagine. He knows this, and he feeds us anyway. He feeds us anyway, and with real food. When we come here looking for small grace, when we come here looking for easy answers, when we come here looking for nothing, when we come here and we don’t know what we’re looking for, God feeds us with nothing less than his whole self, with the body and blood of his only Son Our Lord, given for you and for me.

So blow the trumpet in Zion and call a solemn assembly. For this is Amateur Night, my friends, and the beginning of Amateur Season. For what better time than the season of Lent to remember that our God is gracious and merciful to us, even in those times when we feel like we couldn’t find our faith even if we accidentally stabbed it with a fork? So if you’re worried about being an amateur, knock it off. You are, and that’s okay. If you’re worried that your Lenten disciplines lack even a soupcon of sophistication, knock it off. Who needs sophistication? If you want to fast, fast. If you want to pray more, pray more. If you want to give away more, give away more. Just whatever you decide to do, do it because it will please the God who is madly in love with you. And whatever else you decide to do, please do go out for these next forty days. Go out, go right there to that altar. Don’t let anybody talk you out of it. Eat and drink it all, and have a lovely Lent.

*Yes, I actually did pull these items from Vetri’s current tasting menu.

Preached by Mother Erika Takacs

Ash Wednesday, 14 February 2018

Saint Mark's Church, Philadelphia

Posted on February 16, 2018 .

A Valentine for Ashes

Earlier this week the New York Times pointed out that Ash Wednesday and Valentine’s Day would coincide this year for the first time since 1945, and raised the issue of the tension this coincidence can cause for some Christians, perhaps most especially Roman Catholics.  For, as everybody knows, Valentine’s Day is a day of chocolate and flowers and romance, for candlelight dinners out, for indulgence, especially for indulging the one you love.  But, as everybody knows, Ash Wednesday is a day of somber self-denial, of bread and water, of deciding what to give up for Lent, of being reminded that you are dust and to dust you shall return; it’s the day of the dark smudge on your head, which is meant, I guess, to help you remember not to indulge in much of anything.  It is a most un-romantic day.  

So what’s to be done?  And what am I to say to you that could make a difference to you today, as you contemplate whether or not you should eat chocolate, or take your sweetheart out for an extravagant dinner tonight?  Should I tell you that it’s fine as long as you both order fish?

The series of historic developments that deliver to us a day in the church on which we hear in the Gospel Jesus instruct his followers not to disfigure their faces when they fast, only moments before I propose to do the deed of disfigurement for you by placing a smudge of ash on your forehead is convoluted and basically boring.  But it is evidence that the church has become accustomed, on this day, to holding opposing ideas in tension.  It should not be so hard for us to decide that it is OK to keep Valentine’s Day on Ash Wednesday, and vice versa.

But we in the church have often embraced finger-wagging.  And a great deal of church history involves accusations that you sinful people are pretty awful, but if you do what I, speaking on behalf of the church, tell you to do, you might, just might, escape the fires of hell, where your immortal soul would be forever tortured.  And now I feel compelled to wonder whether or not I must warn you that a box of chocolates enjoyed illicitly today, or a steak dinner tonight will indeed put the salvation of your immortal soul at risk.  I believe this has often been the role of the priest on Ash Wednesday, after all, you are dust and to dust you shall return, so you’d better be careful!

But when I try to think this way, I am reminded how scarce in the world is the good news that God loves you with great tenderness, and with a love that is more profound than any other love that you or I shall ever know.  And it seems perverse to me, on a day that is meant to be all about love, to fail to remind you of this great love that God has for you. 

And if you are lucky enough to be looking forward to celebrating this day with someone with whom you are absolutely smitten, then you do, in fact, need a reminder from this pulpit.  You need to be reminded that God’s love for you is more complete, more wonderful, and more true than even the love you feel for the person to whom you will, I hope, give flowers (and maybe even chocolates) at some point today.

If Ash Wednesday presents to you only a God who is a killjoy in your life, then this would be a terrible way to begin Lent, since the message of God’s love is that he sent his Son to you (and me) so that his joy might be in you, and your joy might be complete.  The reminder of our shared mortality - that we are all dust, and to dust we shall return - means little to those of us who follow Jesus, if it is not accompanied by the assurance of his love.  What can save us from a destiny that amounts to nothing but dust?  Only the love of God who formed us out of the dust, and filled us with the breath of his Spirit, and sent his Son to us to share with us the gift of life after ashes.  And what could be more hypocritical of me today than to encourage you to put aside expressions of love on the very day that God asks us to spend a season of forty days pondering his love.

So if you go out to dinner tonight.  Maybe order fish, maybe don’t.  Maybe share a desert, maybe don’t.  But gaze into the eyes of one you love, and remember to give thanks to the One who made you for love’s sake, and whose love will lead you to life after everything else has been reduced to ashes.  And stop for a minute to consider that you have forty whole days now, to reflect on love.  You might as well make the most of it!

Preached by Fr. Sean Mullen

Ash Wednesday 2018

Saint Mark’s, Philadelphia

 

Posted on February 14, 2018 .

A Lasting Glory

When I was planning my move to Philadelphia almost seven years ago, I received widely varying and always interesting feedback about my choice of apartments. I live at the Marine Club at Broad and Washington, a location that inspired comments ranging from the nostalgic (“Oh, I used to work there back when it was the quartermaster depot for the United States Marines,”) to the disbelieving (“You do know that that’s south of South Street, right?”) I’ll let you guess which of these comments was made by the rector. But the comment I heard more than any other was this one: “Oh, wow! You’ll be in a good spot for the next Phillies parade.”

Now remember, this was 2011, when the Phillies’ victory in the 2008 World Series was still fresh on people’s minds. By the time I got to town, the players were a little older, their bats a little slower, and the chances of my seeing a championship parade during my time of living on Broad Street rather slim. So you can imagine my joy when the Eagles pulled off their upset at last weekend’s Super Bowl. At last! I thought – a championship parade that I can watch from the steps of my building. Which is exactly what I did. No waiting in the cold for me; I just popped outside for 15 minutes of cheering and confetti and then popped right back inside to my comfy couch.

Thursday in Philly was, as I’m sure I don’t need to tell you, a celebration for the ages. It was a kind of impromptu holiday, a day when all other concerns took a back seat to the deeply rooted impulse not only to toast the victors, but to toast them together. There was no school, no work, no diet, no deadline; there was only the desire to be happy together, to celebrate together, to cheer and chant all together. For one day here in Philadelphia, there were no worries; there was only this shared sense of glory. It should be said that this isn’t entirely accurate, of course. The people who were celebrating on Thursday were people who had the luxury of escaping for a day. It’s hard to chant and cheer and forget your worries when you’re living on the street, say, or fighting a heroin addiction. But for those of us who are privileged enough to be able to, as adults, spend an entire day at a parade, Thursday’s celebration in the winter sun helped us to set aside our troubles and revel in this glory, if only for only one moment.

The moment didn’t last. It never does. On Friday people went back to work, and while I’m sure there were plenty of tales told that morning of who got to Eakins Oval the earliest and who got what amazing video, by lunchtime all the stories had been shared, and once again the world – the real, non-midnight green world – started to come back into focus. There were decisions to be made and bills to be paid. There were appointments to be kept and obligations to be met. There was life, real life, and while the memories of this glory moment carried with them significant joy, they were not powerful enough. The glory faded, and there was life, again.

There was a decided lack of confetti on the Mount of Transfiguration. There wasn’t much of a crowd there, either, just Peter and James and John, and Jesus and Moses and Elijah. But Jesus’ transfiguration was a moment of incredible glory, a witnessing beyond the disciples’ wildest dreams. It was a moment for the ages, an unanticipated flash of such dazzling brilliance that I imagine the disciples must have felt their everyday anxieties falling away. No more frustration with the Pharisees, no more uneasiness about Jesus’ predictions of suffering and death, no more worrying of any kind. This glory moment was suddenly all that mattered. Peter was so convinced of this that he suggested they all pull up lawn chairs and sit on the curb a little longer. Why leave this place? Why go back to the real world if they could stay and stretch this moment into infinity?

But this moment wasn’t meant to last, and Peter is missing the point. The truth is that he just doesn’t know what to say; he is transported, but terrified, the Gospel says. But while Peter may not know what to say, God does. God’s voice rolls in from the heavens like thunder and tells Peter, simply, stop talking. “This is my Son, the Beloved;” the voice calls out, “listen to him!” And just like that, the moment is over. The disciples look up and see Jesus alone.

On the way back down the mountain, back down to real life, the disciples must have been wondering what this moment was meant for. Why had Jesus brought them here? Why had Jesus showed them this? Was this moment meant as a gift for them, an impromptu holiday from the challenges of bearing their cross? Was it meant to strengthen them? To inspire them? Was Jesus telling them everything would be all right, or was he just trying to give them one moment of light before the coming darkness of which he spoke so often? As they are walking and wondering, Jesus opens his mouth and begins to speak. And the disciples, as they had just been instructed, listen to him. “As they were coming down the mountain,” Saint Mark tells us, “he ordered them to tell no one about what they had seen, until after the Son of Man had risen from the dead.”

With these words, the disciples look down and see their feet firmly planted back in the real world. For here, once again, is their master’s sorrowful prediction of death and his incomprehensible assertion of rising again from that death. Here, once again, is the hard life of discipleship with all of its unknowns; here, once again, is the cross. Except that in this moment, at the base of this mount of glorious transfiguration, the disciples feel something shift. They notice something miraculous and new. For while the glory moment has passed, Christ’s glory hasn’t faded at all. True, Jesus’ robes have changed back to their normal hue and Moses and Elijah have vanished, but still the disciples can feel the glory. They can still see it; the holy light that was so bright they had to shade their eyes has left a corona around the edges of their vision, and they can see the sparks and flashes of glory everywhere. The moment of revelation may be gone, but Christ’s glory has lingered on.  

On this last Sunday before Ash Wednesday, when we are about to enter into the season of Lent with its real world call to repentance and self-denial, Christ invites us to witness this same, lasting glory. True, we will leave this holy place, the incense will swirl into nothingness and the final notes of the hymn will fade away. When we step outside this place, real life may come roaring back at us with all of its worries, but Christ’s glory will not fade. The moments of transcendence that we find here in these walls, the moments of holiness that we find in our own prayer, these moments are not glimpses of a glory that ebbs and flows in this world. They are moments that bind together all of the ebbs and flows of our own lives, revealing the glory that never fades away. Christ’s glory lasts, it lingers, it runs the length and breadth of our reality, bearing our burdens and transforming them and us from glory into glory.

When we are faithful and proclaim the Gospel, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are terrified and have no idea what we are saying, Christ’s glory lasts. When we recognize it, Christ’s glory lasts. When we ignore it, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are generous and beautiful, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are vile and reprehensible, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are brave, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are cowards, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are highly favored, Christ’s glory lasts. When we are underdogs, Christ’s glory lasts. When we celebrate, Christ’s glory lasts. When we mourn, Christ’s glory lasts. When we respond to our neighbor’s needs, Christ’s glory lasts. When we condemn those in need to their suffering, Christ’s glory lasts. When we protect the vulnerable, Christ’s glory lasts. When we blame the victim, Christ’s glory lasts. When we speak truth, when we lie, when we love one another, when we hate our enemies, when we are willing to climb a mountain to follow him, when we are willing to follow only if it means stepping outside of our comfort zone for 15 minutes or less, Christ’s glory still lasts.    

There is nothing we can do to diminish this glory, just as there is nothing we can do to bring it into being. Our task is to live as if we expect to see it. Our task is to live with eyes wide open, searching for this glory in the world, trusting that today, each day, is a day for the ages, when Christ’s victory continues to draw us in to share in his glory together. Our task is to live with ears open to hear God’s holy imperative – Here is my Son, the Beloved, listen to him – and to respond with happy and humbled hearts, Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening. So look and listen, you loyal followers of Christ. Today is a festival day. The veil is lifted, and the glory of the Lord is revealed in the face of Jesus Christ. Look and listen, you holy disciples. For this moment of glory will last. It always does. Hallelujah.

Preached by Mother Erika Takacs

11 February 2018

Saint Mark's Church, Philadelphia

Posted on February 13, 2018 .